Heavy hearted

My heart feels so heavy and sad today. 

I've done a lot of soul searching as of late and my visit to Farm Sanctuary again this year really made me realize that while I love the work that I do now, my true passion, my calling, is to work with animals. To work toward the protection of animals. Toward speaking to others about the importance of treating animals with love and respect. And while I am still feeling committed to making this change in my life, my heart feels so heavy today with so many things I have read.

Just this week alone, I have read about a sweet dog being shot point blank in the face, have seen a picture of a puppy with a plastic bag over his head, the discovery of 12 starving horses, animals at zoos being starved and neglected.  The list is endless and it just makes me feel so incredibly sad.

What has happened to us as a society where any of this is okay, is acceptable? Have we truly become so greedy, so focused on ourselves, that we disregard living, breathing, sentient beings because they are simply in the way of our end goal? How dare we? Who do we think we are?

It's moments like these when I feel so discouraged, so sickened, that it seems like fighting for animal rights and protection is a battle that can never be won.  How many petitions, how many walks, how many conversations will it take for people to realize that our fundamental hope is for animals to be treated with kindness, gentleness and respect? In a perfect world, animals would no longer be used for food, for clothing, for entertainment. I do my very best to live my life in a way that reflects that wish. But I have long since realized this will never be a perfect world. 

Is it truly too much to ask that the cow that produces your next hamburger, the pig that produces those slices of bacon and the lamb that produces that wool coat, among the millions of other sacrificing their lives, be given compassion.  I guess for some it is too much to ask as that would mean stepping beyond yourself, for one instant, imagining what those animals have gone through and making the decision that you will not be a part of that cruelty. How shameful.

For those who do not make that choice, I choose to do more. To be a louder, stronger voice for those animals who are so easily disregarded. While my heart is heavy now, I know that I can shift that energy into something positive, into making my resolve and dedication to animals that much stronger. I may feel defeated today but will not allow myself to feel that way tomorrow or the day after.  Every animal deserves better and for those who won't do anything, I must do more.

Life-changing

As I begin to write this blog post, I'm wondering how I can possibly describe an experience that was so truly life changing. An experience that so far exceeded my expectations which were set pretty high. An experience that has made me more determined, more passionate and more driven to ensure that all animals are treated with kindness, love and respect.

I was very lucky to visit Farm Sanctuary in Watkins Glen, New York this week while on vacation from work. I have been a supporter of the work and mission of Farm Sanctuary for a few years and have been wanting to visit for that long as well.  Finally, I decided to go finally just go ahead and go.  My only regret is not staying longer.

From the moment I drove up the path to the People Barn I immediately felt at peace.  The beauty of nature could be felt all around me - the smell of the rain showers that had been happening on and off throughout the day, the parting of clouds to allow rays of sunlight to escape, the sound of birds chirping.  I had arrived too late to meet the animals but I settled into my cabin and sat on the deck to take in my surroundings.  I met a wonderful couple who go to Farm Sanctuary every year and as we got to chatting, discovered that not only are they from my home state but the parents of one of them were born in my birth city.  Talk about a small world!

The following morning, I woke up an hour before the alarm went off- I was so excited to meet the animals.  After breakfast, I waited for the tour which began only a half hour later. I was the only guest taking the tour at that time and the staff member leading the tour was so great, so open to all my questions and comments.

The first animal I met was Thunder, a 2900 pound steer. The height of his body matched mine and as he ate grass and I reached out to pet him, I was awed by his strength and his comfort in allowing us to be around him. It was heartwarming to hear about how he has become part of a  herd and has made friends with the other cows at the farm.  

We continued on the tour, stopping in each barn and meeting sheep and goats-I wish I could remember each of their names.  Some were still skittish, having been treated so cruelly by humans and not quite able to trust again, just yet.  Others came right over to us, wanting to feel the touch of our hands, the calmness and care in our voices. To know that some humans still care.

I have been sponsoring a goat on the farm, Gloria, for a few months now and was beyond exited to meet her. As I mentioned to the staff member leading the tour, I have her picture on a bulletin board in my office and thought of her as a friend.  Finally getting to meet her, to pet her and feel her playful headbutts was almost overwhelming.  Her story took on new meaning as she became even more real.  

The turkeys on the farm are so big in size, so pumped full of chemicals to ensure more meat. A lot are de-beaked, a process whereby part of the beak is removed, to ensure that the chickens do not peck each other while confined to battery cages. It is done without anesthesia. The peck because they are cramped together, unable to even spread their wings, and yet the solution (rather than giving each animal more space) is to cause pain.  It is a mentality I never want to understand.

I could go on for hours about how each and every animal I was lucky enough to meet touched my heart in ways I couldn't even have imagined but more than anything this experience has reinforced what I already knew.  Each one of the beings on the farm, each one of the animals that are raised each year to be slaughtered, made into an accessory or eaten, are beings who deserve so much  more than the treatment we are allowing to happen to them.

Each animal of the farm has a name, a personality, feelings.  I saw it so clearly as one cow, still nervous around people, moved away from us when we approached her.  As she lingered close by, I slowly reached out to pet her-she allowed me to and I thanked her.  Her tail began to ever so slightly move.  It is a connection, a moment of comfort for both she and I that I will carry with me always.

I left with renewed purpose, with increased passion to ensure that farm animals are given the humane treatment all living beings deserve and have a right to.  I have not eaten meat for two years and the thought of doing so now, more do than before, is unimaginable.  I am now 100% committed to becoming vegan.  

Thank you Farm Sanctuary for the inspiring, healing, amazing work that you do on a day to day basis.  My visit with the animals and to the farm was a gift that I do not have adequate words to express thanks for.  I look forward to returning soon.

Please click below for a slideshow of pictures from my visit!

Farm Sanctuary 2012

An Animal Called "It"

Recently, I was looking back over some emails, one of which was from a staff member at an animal shelter I had volunteered at some time ago.  The email referenced a training which would be held in the coming weeks, a training that I attended and took away very valuable information from.  But, I also recalled being frustrated at something the trainer repeated several times - reference to a cat or a dog as "it".  This has quickly become not only a pet peeve but a source of increased frustration for me - whenever an animal is called "it" and especially when this comes from individuals who work with animals.  

When did it become acceptable, the norm if you will, to refer to a living, breathing being as an "it"? 

I'm sitting here at my desk, and I can identify numerous "its" - my computer, my phone, my lamp, my pen, my water bottle, the picture of the ocean on my bulletin board, the chair I'm sitting in.  You see where I'm going here, I imagine. Nowhere in that list would I include the bird chirping outside the window or my two girls at home, who like most cats at this time of day, are likely curled up together asleep somewhere. Nor would I include the animals at a shelter or the animals I see when I drive by local farms.

I have a journal in my desk drawer where I write quotes that I find inspirational or moving in some way.  I will often take the book out in the morning and find one that I connect with each day-I usually end up tweeting whichever quote that is as well.  There is one quote, I keep coming back to, keep wanting to post, but have been thwarted in my attempts by  140 characters or less:

"Can one regard a fellow creature as a property item, an investment, a piece of meat, an 'it' without degenerating into cruelty towards that creature?" Karen Davis, PhD

I don't know what it is in the human psyche that, at times, feels the need to be superior to such an extent as to deem a creature with a heart, eyes, limbs or fins an inanimate object?  Is it a defense that allows cruelty which is so commonplace to occur? If we view an animal as an it, then we can deny that he or she feels pain, we can justify our actions. 

Words have such power and I fear that we are sometimes too quick to use them, not thinking about what our words can mean. I believe that when we call an animal "it", we take away an identity, an ability to feel pain and joy, an ability to live life as a being, not as an object.  We wouldn't want that for ourselves, our friends and family - we shouldn't want nor allow this to happen to animals.